TW: This article discusses eating disorders, body dysmorphia, and mental health struggles, including detailed personal experiences. Please take care while reading.
As reported by the BBC in a recent article just last year:
“One in five professional female footballers experienced disordered eating over a 12-month period, according to a study led by players’ union FifPro.”
What was once a taboo subject, but now requires urgent attention, is increasingly becoming a major area of concern within women’s football. Eating disorders or disordered eating can come hand in hand with body dysmorphia – a mental health condition where a person spends a lot of time worrying about flaws in their appearance. Both of these conditions are extremely difficult to deal with mentally, and can cause psychological distress amongst even top female athletes.
Millie Bright, Fran Kirby, Clare Rafferty, and Molly Bartrip have all opened up about their struggles with overcoming either one or both of these mental health conditions. And, in saying this, so have I.
From growing up, I played football since I was 6 or 7 years old. Starting out playing for Northside – my local boys’ team, to then switching to play with girls, where I started out at Shrewsbury Town. My career then led me to playing in America when I was 17, and then coming home to sign for Birmingham City. It was at this point in my career when I was 19 that I started to feel the pressures of performance, nutritional choices, and physique awareness.
I had never known anyone with an eating disorder before, so I wasn’t truly aware of what it was. It was around the time I was pushing for a spot in Birmingham City’s first team that I started receiving strange comments from the managerial staff. Comments such as ‘I know you have Italian in your family, so be careful what you eat’, and ‘we’ve noticed you’ve lost some weight, well done’. I need to point out that at this time I was a perfect weight for my age and height, and was in no way what they deemed ‘overweight’.
It was at this moment, I immediately stopped eating properly, began excessively overtraining, and began purging. Weirdly though, football wise, I was on Cloud nine. I was faster, stronger, and more alert than ever. I got my first ever call up and my first ever cap for the Wales senior team at this point too, which when I look back now, is crazy.
But of course, this didn’t last, and I slowly began to get weaker, more tired, less switched on, and my love of the game dwindled. My body was running on empty, and the cracks were starting to show. This went on for a couple of years, until the moment came during a preseason session when I was playing for Coventry City. I sat down with the captain at that time and she was amazing. She told me to go and get help, and that football would always be there when I return. Because of her, I felt safe to step away from the game in an attempt to rescue my life – I owe a lot to this person.
I had to quit my job, and get help. The few years following this I spent in day patient units, and then in an in-patient unit in Chester for five months. I was very poorly at this point; I couldn’t even walk I was so ill.
Time passed, and I got stronger, and was discharged. Without going into too much detail, it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Getting better from an eating disorder is not a quick fix, and the mental battle some days were just too much – I couldn’t do it.
What I’m trying to say is this: two or three careless, offhand comments shattered my career and my life. They nearly destroyed me.
That’s the reality. So be kind, be careful, be alert, and always look out for your team mates because you never know what’s going on off the pitch, out of the changing rooms, away from the hustle and bustle of training.
An eating disorder or body dysmorphia can happen to anyone at any age from grassroots to elite level. With virtually no support systems, prevention, or treatment in place, it wasn’t until just three years ago that Fara Williams, former midfielder for Everton, Chelsea, and the Lionesses, spoke out about the culture of disordered eating in women’s football. She described being constantly monitored and noted how many players struggled with their diets. When I read this, it filled me with both sadness and anger.
Most recently, Australian and West Ham midfielder Katrina Gorry opened up about her struggles, telling the BBC in January 2025 that some days she didn’t even want to get out of bed. Even with no prior history of disordered eating, Gorry went on to explain how she felt her eating had spiralled out of control, and left her in a dark place where after four years of struggles she didn’t want to see anyone, train or even go out the house. It was only after her pregnancy did Gorry state that she experienced ‘a new found respect for herself’, and this process helped her learn to love her body again for what it was capable of, no matter how she looked or felt.
It’s a fine line when it comes to a support system for disordered eating. One that if overly pushed in the face of a player or even if completely ignored for fear of ‘getting the wrong end of the stick’ can leave the person who is struggling in a much worse place.
So the question I beg to ask is, how can we better support female footballers who struggle with disordered eating? How can we ensure that no girl or woman has to experience what I went through, what Katrina went through, or Millie or Fran?
I don’t have the answer, but what I do know is that if this, me sharing part of my story, helps one person to reach out for help, then that’s one less player struggling in silence.
If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder or mental health challenges, please seek help. There are many people and organisations ready to offer support, and you are not alone.
National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA)
Website: www.nationaleatingdisorders.org
Helpline: 1-800-931-2237
Beat Eating Disorders (UK)
Website: www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk
Helpline: 0808 801 0677
Samaritans (Mental Health Support – UK)
Helpline: 116 123 (Available 24/7)
